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Why You Need Friends
I had an interesting conversation about friendship years ago. We had just moved to a new duty station and I was concerned that my husband wasn’t putting in any effort to find new friends. He looked at me, confused, “I already have friends.” “But you don’t have friends, here.” He was someone who only needed…
Finding Friends Who Aren’t Afraid of Your Mess
My family moved to a new town a couple nights before starting high school. I knew no one and spent the majority of my 9th grade year eating lunch alone. I’ve never been someone that’s been able to make myself fit in so it was really challenging to find the people I vibed with. No…
You Believe What You Do
I was a very litigious adolescent. I mean, I wasn’t literally bringing court cases as a 12 year old, but I saw injustice everywhere. This happened to be in the late 90s and early 00s when “hypocrisy” was a regular topic of conversation and “hypocrite” a label to be avoided. The buzzword was used to…
The Sacred Practice of Saying ‘No’
Last week I wrote about integrity and I felt like I left something out: being a person of integrity isn’t just about what you do. It’s also about what you don’t do. I’ve had a few conversations lately with people who feel like their friends only show up when they need something. They’re dissatisfied with…
Being Honest About Your Weaknesses (Even When It Hurts)
Have you ever worried what would happen if you had to be honest about your imperfections? Do you feel like life is sometimes a Jenga tower, balanced on some of your strengths with each weakness only precariously holding up the blocks above them? Do you acknowledge your weaknesses or do you prefer to pretend like…
You’re Not Failing, You’re Just Overwhelmed
How do you get anything done if everything has to get done?I mean, I love a good list. I’m great at organizing my thoughts. I’m even getting really good at delegating.But where do you start when your to do list is longer than Santa’s? Someone once told me you can only reasonably expect yourself to…
For When You Feel Like a Failure
I distinctly remember sitting in counseling one day, frustrated with myself. I’d only been a solo parent for a few years and was struggling to juggle the responsibilities that come with parenting, keeping home functional and people fed, and giving myself and kids the time and space to process everything we’d just experienced. In the…
It Felt Like My Faith Was Part of the Problem
This post was originally published on incourage.me. I had gotten my two kids and myself dressed for church and finished filling two huge cookie jars for the church coffee hour. Other than the presence of some more-than-usual tension in my chest, I would’ve thought it was any other Sunday morning. But then, everything went wrong….
4 Mantras For When I’m Overwhelmed
If life is really hard for you right now, I wish I could reach through the screen and give you a giant hug. Since I can’t, I wrote down my 4 Mantras For When I’m Overwhelmed; you can print it out and hang it where you’ll see it often so you can be reminded that…
10 Ways To Prepare For The Next Hard Thing
At this point in my life I have experienced more loss and hardship than most. And I’ve learned to accept that there will still be hard things to come. Sometimes people tell me I’ve had more than my fair share of suffering. Maybe that’s true, but it’s not comforting. Because there isn’t a suffering quotient….