young widow

10 Ways To Prepare For The Next Hard Thing

At this point in my life I have experienced more loss and hardship than most. And I’ve learned to accept that there will still be hard things to come. Sometimes people tell me I’ve had more than my fair share of suffering.  Maybe that’s true, but it’s not comforting. Because there isn’t a suffering quotient….

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For When Grief Hits You From Out of Nowhere

It’s been almost four years since my husband died. I’m mostly doing great. I still get sad sometimes. Other times I’m disappointed or angry that this is my real life. But, on the whole, life is good. We’ve found new routines and ways of doing things. We feel settled. I skirt the edge of grieving,…

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Disappearing Act: Let Your Grief Breathe

I disappeared this year. Not just a quiet period away from social media, but a full on disappearance from my life. I never quite made it to hang out with friends and I sat in the hallway during church, unable to engage with a sermon or much of the music. When I sat down to…

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Why You Never Leave Your Grieving Friend Alone

Why You Never Leave Your Grieving Friend Alone | BeckyLMcCoy.com

“You’ve got so much going on. I didn’t want to burden you with my hard stuff.” “I didn’t want to make you more sad. I try and only share stuff that will cheer you up.” “I wasn’t sure if I should say anything. I hate to bother you.” I’ve heard dozens of versions of those…

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When You Feel Broken At Christmas

When You Feel Broken At Christmas | BeckyLMcCoy.com

Everywhere I look, there are signs of a shiny, bright, perfect Christmas. Smiling family photos. Perfectly decorated homes and trees. Happy people enjoying happy friends at happy Christmas parties. Christmas movies that elicit giggles and end in magical first kisses. Cookies and hot cocoa and fires and snow (or at least dreams of it). Sometimes…

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The Worst Part of Being a Single Mom is the Exhaustion

Being a single mom never gets easier. I’ve got my ways of coping – preschool and playdates help this introverted mama recharge and stay on top of the to do list – but there isn’t much wiggle room for when the schedule gets turned upside down. Last week, there was a snow day. I knew…

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When You Feel Stuck on the Outside of Your Life

A reality of grief and depression is that you often feel stuck outside of your life. Last week, I had a few days where I felt like I was watching my life and not living it. I took deep breaths, trying to ground myself, feeling like I was floating away with nothing to pull me…

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Reflections From An Air Force Widow

This post is not meant to upstage anyone who is struggling this Memorial Day due to the loss of a loved one or with PTSD of lost airmen, soldiers, and sailors. This can be a difficult holiday for so many reasons. Memorial Day has crept up and taken me by surprise. I do not presume…

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When Your Heart Feels Scraped Open

When I was in Kindergarten I remember being impressed with the fact that my knees were constantly scraped open. I laugh now thinking about how it was because of my inability to walk anywhere without tripping over myself. Regardless of how I achieved the look, I had scars on my knees until 5th grade. My…

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