Dear Dad

Bird Sanctuary

At the south end of Long Beach Island, NJ there used to be a huge bird sanctuary. It was at least a mile of untouched beach, populated solely by birds. It was the quietest part of the island and a place of refuge for me. Hurricane Sandy wrecked the bird sanctuary. There’s still some beach…
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Dear Dad: Pop Pop’s Boat

Dear Dad: Caleb got to go for his first boat ride this weekend. Growing up, riding on Grampa’s boat was an inevitable part of summer. We have read, slept, fished, and watched 4th of July fireworks together on that boat, so I have been looking forward to the day when I could share it with…
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Dear Dad: Another Birthday

Dear Dad, I’ve been hesitating (maybe avoiding) writing you. Over the last two weeks, I’ve had more days than not where I wake up missing you. Or find myself looking forward to going to Connecticut to see you. It’s bizarre that my brain just can not accept that you’re really not here even though it’s…
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Dear Dad: Early Mornings

Dear Dad: We got to spend a night at the lake this week. When I woke up in the morning, there was fog on the lake and the trees were brilliantly colored. I could almost see you out in a kayak, enjoying the silence and peace of the early mornings. Getting up early with Caleb…
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Dear Dad: Happy Birthday

Dear Dad: I have been dreading this week for a year now. Last year on your birthday, I was with you in the hospital after your surgery. I bought you dental floss and disposable razors and deodorant from the gift shop because that’s what you wanted. I splurged on a Happy Birthday balloon, but you…
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Dear Dad: It Takes a Village

Dear Dad: I have been so thankful for all of the friends and family that have surrounded us to encourage and support us in raising Caleb. The best parenting definitely includes a village of helping hands! Over the last six months, I have realized that a village of helpers is equally important in grief. Two…
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Dear Dad: Grief Is A Journey

Dear Dad: We are in Bolivia for another 1.5 weeks and today Caleb and I are stuck at home because of the blockades all around the city. Keith had to walk to work; it’s an insane, long, uphill walk, poor guy! The blockades have been making me think about my grief journey, though. While everyone…
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Dear Dad: Easter

Dear Dad: How on earth has it been 5 months already? I feel like it was just yesterday we were wandering along the edge of Bryce Canyon together, talking about your grandson and all the adventures we’d take him on. We celebrated Easter today (another holiday without you) and I’m seeing it in a whole…
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Dear Dad: Valentine’s Day

Dear Dad: I’ve never been a huge celebrater of Valentine’s Day; you and mom did a great job of demystifying such a silly holiday. Today just feels different – somehow this “holiday” is making me miss you more than Thanksgiving or Christmas. Every year, you always found the silliest cards and filled them with affirmations…
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Dear Dad: Letting Go

Dear Dad: We are in New Jersey at Grandma’s house for the first time since you passed away. It’s really weird to bring my son to the house where you grew up. I love watching Caleb interact with Grandma (we call her GiGi now); they are best buds and attached at the hip. I cried…
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